Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Time Passage

As of yesterday I have only 11 days left of my radiation treatment. I have completed a full 22 days. It is the opposite of chemo in terms of time. My summer was the longest of my life. Time seemed to drag on and on in between treatments. It was like those dreams where you just can't move fast enough. Radiation is different. 22 sessions have flown by. I am now 2/3 of the way done and I don't know how it went by.

I made it through an entire four weeks before I started to see some effects. Just over the past 2 days I have started to see some redness on my skin and am starting to feel tired. My radiation oncologist told me it would be different from chemo fatigue and he is correct. Chemo fatigue is a lack of energy type of fatigue. Radiation is just plain tired, like you didn't get enough sleep at night. By late afternoon I am feeling like I could take a nap. It isn't horrible, just feels like I need a cup of coffee and should go to bed early. So I listened to my body and went to bed early 2 days in a row.

When I was first diagnosed I talked a lot with my friend Kristina who was almost exactly a year out from her round of treatments. At the time a year seemed like an eternity and I couldn't visualize being where she is. I just didn't know how I was going to get through chemo and radiation and the fear and emotions of being diagnosed.

I have been at it now for almost 6 months. I was diagnosed on May 7th and have been doing surgery, chemo, radiation, appointments, blood draws and waiting, waiting, waiting ever since. I can see me being where Kristina was. I can imagine being a year past diagnosis. I can see my life returning to normal. I know that watching my children grow, I will find that time is going too fast again and I will want it to slow down, but right now, I am glad to have radiation zooming by.

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